The Truth About Children, Big Dreams And The Future
My little O totally surprised me when she suddenly announced that she would like to have 4 children when she grows up. She was even specific about the gender - two girls and two boys. Upon hearing the statement, my first reaction was to ask her if she was sure. When asked why, I said because raising children is a lot of work - I especially feel that way, because as an introvert mother, I am not taken to babies naturally. And if having two children (again, I'm thinking from such personal perspective) are such hard work, what about four?! Would it be easier because the children have themselves to entertain each other, or would it be survival of the fittest for the mother??
Yes, I reacted by explaining to her that having children is a huge commitment and responsibility as you want your children to grow into exemplary adults, and if she wants four children that means she will face four times the hard work. Personally, that is one of the reasons why I limit myself to two children, besides my own desire for a more compact family life. More than two and they will drive me nuts! And another reason is also because I was blessed with two equally high need babies (think of constant crying, constant carrying, and constant need of cuddles and skin contact, at least in the first year or so). Even if I decide one day to have another child, it will be a long time coming. I need a break from babyhood, period (at the time of the writing, miss E is right smack in the middle of toddlerhood. Two-years-old is such a ride, yeehaw!).
Miss O gave me a blank look as I tried to impart to her my view of the subject. And then she gave me a happy-go-lucky grin. That’s okay, mama, because everyone needs to make a choice, and I really want two boys and two girls. Six years old and yet so sure. She might change her mind in the future, but for now she is certain of what she wants from life.
I blinked, feeling nonplussed. And then I remember a certain fifth grader whose greatest dream was to become a mother, and nothing else. I was that little girl. I still remembered the strong desire like it was yesterday. It was still present in me today. And for me being a mother is one of my greatest joy and achievement. So I guess it doesn't matter if the dream is big or small - it is our job as parents to listen and probably to encourage them.
As for Miss O? After she gave me a piece of her wisdom, she continued talking about unrelated issues happily. But her statement has forever stayed in my mind. I chuckle to myself whenever I remember. I think it's cute. Oh well, que sera, sera - whatever happens, happens. Besides, she has plenty of time to change her mind.
It's your turn to share! Have you ever been shocked or at least surprised by your innocent children's 'future' plans? How did you react to his/her words?
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